Sara Hammerzmith

Just when you think things were really going great, people keep stabbing you in the back. Doesn’t it simply suck when that happens? And seemingly, everything does. He turned my world upside down, he’s made me lose some of my really close friends… but in all of this, I’ve also seen what people are there for me, what people I can trust. Nathalie, Curt, Michelle, Paula, Faedra, Madlen, Sophie, Emelie – you are seriously golden.

But on a good note – I’ve finally booked the thing that’ll make me go away from everything and everyone, and it’ll be so good to get away. Not just from home, but from Europe. So you don’t have to deal with friends comparing you to your ex’s ex, so you don’t have to deal with deceiving people. And you won’t have to worry to run into people. You wouldn’t think this happens on a playground like Europe, but it really does.

So what I’m trying to say is – WE HAVE FINALLY BOOKED OUR TICKETS TO AUSTRALIA! At least one way. Damn. Finally we are on our way!

// Sara

Sunday was supposed to be a productive day, but I can’t say I have done a lot to make it become such. Oh well, at least I tried I guess. The only things actually achieved is getting new bikinibottoms and paying bills, haha.

The stress over the trips that’s creeping closer doesn’t exactly help. Shit sucks when you get left alone with things. But the best thing you can do is just to keep working and keep getting it together. And I guess if it’s anything I’m decently good at, it’s getting things together no matter what.

The next week, by the way, I planned to focus a bit on new CD’s. Both some oldies, but also new ones. I hope it’ll make things a little more interesting!

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?
They strung up a man
They say who murdered three.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met at midnight
In the hanging tree.

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?
Where dead man called out
For his love to flee.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met at midnight
In the hanging tree.

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?
Where I told you to run,
So we’d both be free.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met at midnight
In the hanging tree.

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?
Wear a necklace of rope,
Side by side with me.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met at midnight
In the hanging tree.

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?
Where I told you to run,
So we’d both be free.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met at midnight
In the hanging tree.

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?
They strung up a man
They say who murdered three.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met at midnight
In the hanging tree.

Are you, are you
Coming to the tree?
Where dead man called out
For his love to flee.
Strange things did happen here
No stranger would it be
If we met at midnight
In the hanging tree.

// Sara

Lazy day. Been cleaning quite a bit in my room, and spent the days looking into the possibilities of getting the Epica albums I want before the trip. It’s sort of a bad situation. I want the Epica albums before the trip, but it would also be handy to have most or all of Powerwolfs albums too, but I guess I have to make choices. Gladly, I managed to find three of the Epica albums fairly cheap, so I’ll look for the other two while in Helsinki before making any decisions.

It’s sort of weird to think about that it’s just a little more than a week until we go to Helsinki. A little bit more than a week until… SlipKnot. And other things. Before this years concert year is off to a rocking (to say the least) start. I had hoped to have planned what to bring yet, but I haven’t. The only thing I know for sure is the vinyl. Oh dear oh dear.

Anyway, today I finished “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire” as well as “The Hunger Games: Mocking Jay Pt1”. Over all, I think they were both fine, even though I’m still missing lots of bits from the book – Like when Plutarch showed Katniss the clock, proper introduction of the other tributes, as well as the whole theory of 13. Now it was more like they simply appeared at 13.

However, unlike the whole pin and Prim thing, I think at least they did good savings on the parts they had to cut in these two movies. For Mockingjay, I don’t think they could have done it a lot more better than this, I guess we’ll have to see what I think and say once I’ve seen Mockingjay 2, which I hopefully will see next week.

// Sara

Sleeping in today was good. Like, so good. I needed it, with my cold coming up. Did some last minute work during the afternoon, but aside this, it has been a good, calm and quiet Topsy Turvy day.

The only truly evenful thing that actually happened, is that “Hunger Games” aired on TV today and it was actually something I had looked forward too for like, a week. You see, today was “Hunger Games” and tomorrow it’s “Catching Fire” and I literally just rented “Mocking Jay 1” which makes it perfect in time for seeing “Mocking Jay 2” at the cinema.

Anyway. This isn’t technically the first time I saw the movie, but it’s the first time since I read the book, so basically I knew a bit more now. And one thing that truly pisses me off, is the lack of Madge. It doesn’t make sense that Katniss got the pin from her sister, I mean, if they couldn’t bother to put in Madge, who’s actually fairly important in all books, at least they could have had Sae give Katniss the pin or something. Sigh. So annoying.

But aside that, it was actually a rather good evening. And to wrap it up, I accidently stumbled across this video of Timo Tolkki’s Avalon – Enshrined In My Memory, featuring Elize Ryd. I have the feeling Elize is literally everywhere. I loved the song A LOT though, so I really need to look into this.

Now; off to bed. I really want to turn back the hours.

// Sara

Alright, so let me tell you this. This night was my last night at my job for now, and I was going to enjoy it. I know the district well, so it should be no major problem. I was casually driving around, in the middle of the night, pitch black, blasting my new “Blood of the Saints” album on full volume, talking to myself about whatever, “We Drink Your Blood” was the very song that was played…

When the radio got completely silent.

In my head, I know exactly what is about to come. But it doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t change those seconds of fear when you ask yourself “Is someone in the car with me?” “Is someone controlling the car from somewhere else?” “Is the car breaking down?” “Is the car going to explode?”

And then, after you’ve questioned this, and after the silence, comes the creepiest of signals. I can’t even describe it to you, all I can say is that only thinking about the signal makes me cry writing this. The signal was followed by this lady speaking very loudly, informing me about a car accident that happened close by, also stating it’s hard to pass it right now.

Then it got silent again, before Attila’s voice took over the speakers. I am not lying when I tell you this.

I had to stop the car. Turn off the CD and I sat and sobbed for a couple of minutes before I turned on the radio and kept going, still crying. After going a few more distances, I dared to turn on the CD again and after a little while I was back to normal.

You see guys, I’m not afraid of a lot of things. Spiders don’t scare me, men following me at night don’t scare me, close to nothing scare me. Apart from this. This, the traffic announcements, are my true arch enemy. I have come across this three times, and I always end up crying and sobbing out of fear every time it happens. It’s a mixture of fear of malfunctional technology, but also fear of the dark, or perhaps, what is in the dark. If I get stuck in the car in the middle of nowhere… What will happen?

Seriously, I’m shaking now that I’ve written this all out, but it feels good to have done so.

Jaha, so apart from this then. We booked the UK part of our trip, finally. We are now trying to get in touch with Etihad Airways so we can cancel our outbound flight to Australia and rebook it, and then we can finally start looking at Frankfurt. It’s shaping up really well.

And oh! I got another of my late Christmas gifts too. Stone Sour’s “Come What (Ever) May”.

// Sara

I love my work. I really do. But when it’s slippery like it was last night, it’s basically the shift from hell again. Everything was all fun and games until I hit this, pretty big turn actually, but I just feel the car slide away and all I can do is sitting in the cabin and go “no no no no no no no no no no” and then, since it’s me, I felt the car stop RIGHT BEFORE the edge of the road, so, with my heart up my throat I survived.

Anyway. Today was a reaaally good day, actually. I met up with Tatiana, my childhood friend who currently lives in London, where she’s studying at a musiccollege. She’s a violinist, and seriously, she’s a big role model for me in a way. She just went out there and got what she wanted.

We went for a coffee and just sat for hours catching up about everything and nothing. I haven’t seen her for soooo long, I didn’t even know she was in the UK. She’s been all over – Germany, Denmark – you name it. It was really good seeing her, and the cutiepie that she is, even brought me some British tea. Thanks sweetheart.

Later in the day, when I came home… my eyes almost popped out. There it was. That brown… devilish parcel on the table. And just by looking at it I knew. And it all came back. How I postponed it. How I always said “I’ll do it tomorrow”. “I’ll do it tonight”. “Oh what the heck, I’ll do it tomorrow”.

In my defense… it was made to order! I never thought it’d actually show up! But you know… I guess for once, just once… It did.

So basically, I’m sitting here with that very CD I was supposed to cancel, Hahaha. Oh, what a time to be alive! But you know, it doesn’t really matter. If I can host the different editions of “Deadache” and the different editions of all the Sabaton albums, I guess I can have double of this one too. After all, I believe this is a good one.

If this wasn’t enough, I also got a Taylor Swift album from my brother! I might have told you that I had some extra christmas gifts coming in, and one of them were T-Swift’s album “1989”. I’m so excited. I’m having my last shift for this time at work, and now I got plenty of new albums to listen to.

I have actively destroyed “Metallum Nostrum” forever by abusing it at work, so it was a nice change to have “Gods and Generals” last night. But tonight will probably be dominated by “Blood of the Saints” and “1989”.

// Sara

January 2nd. I came home pretty late from Michelle’s yesterday, and I pretty much dashed into bed preparing for tonights work. I didn’t encounter as many rabbits as usual, but on the other hand, I came across the creepiest bird ever. I approached the mailbox and was just about to throw in the magazine when I heard it. When I heard the creepiest bird in this world starting to laugh at me.

And you see, I’m not really afraid of anything in particular. Not spiders, not snakes, nothing. But I tell you this – that fucking bird right there… holy hell. I’m glad I had a car so I could get out of there.

Jaha, else? My cactus has grown. My christmas-tree cactus has actually fucking grown. I remember I looked at it, and felt something was wrong, and I stood there and simply looked at it for a good ten minutes before I realized – it had actually fucking grown. That means, for the first time in my life I’ve managed to make something grow. I’m proud.

Spent the day doing.. not a lot. Mostly trying to clean the bombed whorehouse that is my room, watching “Water for Elephants” and now I’m sitting here at Jennie’s playing Neopets. It’s interesting, how she’s like… she bit her tounge. When she lost at Meerca Chase. I haven’t laughed this hard ever since a long time, and it felt good. Jennie thought I was insane and should shut up.

Typical her, ay?

// Sara

Happy New Year folks!

I hope you had an awesome start of the year, because I sure as hell did. We started out early in the morning with delivering newspapers, but this time, I was not alone, since my precious people Paula and Michelle decided to join me. Sadly, the papers were a bit delayed, but no big problems. We went off and did some last minute shopping before going home to Arvika and going to bed for a couple of hours.

We got up, started preparig when our fourth person arrived – Robert! He’d driven all the way from Stockholm to be here, and it was fucking amazing to see him again. We got all ready and dressed up, and at 7 sharp Linette, Jimmy and Sofia showed up, and we began with dinner.

After dinner… basically everything happened all at once.

It was discussions about everything and nothing, Q&A’s, watching various asian porn videos (and of course two girls one cup) playing with dogs… And then the clock turned twelwe and we went outside to watch the fireworks, and of course, Robert took the damned oppurtunity to fire off some snowballs in my direction. Fuck him. Seriously.

The rest of the night consisted of dancing and singing to Alestorm, headbanging with dogs in your arms, headbanging over all, humping around and putting toiletpaper on a sleeping Michelle.

I guess we can safely say this was one hell of a new years celebration! Can’t wait to do it all over again. Although I don’t really want the year to end… Hm. Tough one.

// Sara